Unsure

I took Seth to second grade today. We had no information other than the name of his teacher (which I sort of remembered....I knew it started with a "C") so I tried taking him to directly to his classroom. But his teacher didn't have her name on the door because she's new so I had to ask someone else where Mrs. Crossley's classroom was. The teacher responded, "Miss Coley?" Well, of course, that's what I meant! The bell had rung and the kids were lining up outside so I had to take Seth back outside to line up. There was a lot of Spanish being spoken outside. It's not a bad thing, I'm just not used to it. In reality, for the percentage of moms there by race, I was a minority. I went inside with him and saw him find his desk. His class is big and diverse and he was very quiet and nervous.

tallest kid in his class once again!

First day of second grade for Seth.

The pick-up scene was straight out of Mr. Mom. They have a new system and it was a mess. I heard the instructions from the morning, but was the only minivan in the new pick-up line after school and I doubted myself. I moved the van and parked not wanting Seth to have any panic about where I would be. But then the principle came out and hollered at all the parents "doing it wrong." I was right, darn it! Should have stuck to my guns but Seth will know where to find me tomorrow.

Seth said he had a good day. I remembered the trick to not ask general questions so kept peppering him with specifics like, "Did you do any math?" "Did you play soccer at recess?" Turns out he played by himself at recess and can't remember who he sat by at lunch, but the boys who sits next to him, "seems like a nice boy" (his words). I must not panic. I am not sure about this school.

I had my first invitation for a park play date today. A nice woman from my ward came to my door at 4:00 to see if I wanted to walk to the park with her. Jay had just gotten home (academic day) so I asked if we could do it another day. So that's hopeful.

I feel like my situation here is very unusual. Most of the time, when you move, you'd think that finding friends, getting yourself out there, would be important. But, we have so much family so close by that we have this built in social network. And we are only here for one year. So, my desire to bond with women in my ward is low. Not non-existent, but low. That feels wrong to me.

Then, add the fact that I am now in a place that affords the opportunity to meet new "blogger" friends. I can honestly say, a year ago, I would never have imagined any desire to meet anyone I happened to meet via the internet. It really seemed weird to me. But here it is, a year later, and I went to see a movie with a blogger, having lunch with a blogger and going to an actual blog party on Saturday. I heard about it awhile ago but you know how many little circles there are in blogland, and I'm not really part of this particular blog party circle. But, I know about it and I know some of the people going, and I started to convince myself that I'm a blogger and should go! Now, I'm not so sure. Well, I RSVP'd...so I'm going. But it's kind of like going on a blind date for me. Except I know exactly how they look and pretty much everything about their lives. So...maybe not so blind. But you know what I mean, right? I don't know what their voice sounds like, or if they do this thing with their neck that drives me crazy or if they are a close talker. Even worse, what if I'm neck lady and I don't even know it? Then, there could be this coded talk going on around blogs about neck lady and I'd be thinking, "I didn't notice her."

Real life studies insist that there will be people I am drawn to, that I enjoy talking to and mingling with, and that there will be people there who I do not. And vice versa. I don't want people not to like me. And I can avoid that very thing if I don't go. But I RSVP'd. So I'm going.

Do you know how many cameras are going to be there? You know I can't control all the cropping and editing with all of those cameras!! What if someone doesn't delete the unflattering picture of my double chin or crazy eyes? Eeek! Really, I should be focused on the great and wonderful new relationships that I will enjoy but all I can think about is which shirt will best camouflage my arms. Stay tuned.

So I need some courage. I know some of you would go at the drop of the hat and have a ball. But, I have been given the responsibility to bring a good-mail exchange present and I know some unlucky girl, who probably loves ribbon, is going to have to go home disappointed with my store-bought TJ Maxx great find.

Would anybody else be stressing about this? It'll be fun, right?