Before you call the ACLU, know that I am referring to my own alter ego - horribly-stressed-out-self-absorbed-no-fun-to-be-around, Lucy.
What a difference a week and one less house makes. Last Monday, I seriously thought I was starting to lose my mind. Everyone and everything bugged me. I wondered if the world was picking on me and was annoyed by everyone else’s charmed lives. Honestly, I think I got a glimpse of what the start of a nervous breakdown might feel like. I have no idea why the sale of our house affected me so. Perhaps it was never having to move growing up. We stayed put and I never witnessed the stress of a move or really how a grown-up should handle it. I've certainly moved before though. Heck, I moved every semester in college. Of course, it was easier then when I could fit every single one of my belongings in the back seat of a car. And I never had to sell what I was living in.
I felt so vulnerable about everything. I don't know about any of you, but I find it a bit overwhelming to let strangers wander about in my house, looking at my things and thinking, "tsk, tsk" or "no, thank you. I don't want to live here." I mean, I made the decision five years ago that this house was perfectly fine. If it didn't sell, wouldn't that say something about my own judgment?
On the flip side, all of that personal responsibility regarding the house has led to this halo following me around the last few days. The quick sale and subsequent requests all weekend long to see the house and the disappointment that it's sold already have me feeling all loved and adored. Why? I do realize they aren't buying me. Sort of. I guess.
I've always been a moody person and know that this glow won't last but I'm loving every minute of it right now. This morning, I exercised (you know I've got to be feeling pretty good for that to happen), cleaned the house (I'm trying the maintenance thing for now) and met friends at the park for almost three hours. A perfectly reasonable day. In fact, it's my kind of day. I hope it's the kind of day I get to have the next two months I'm here.
And that not-so-fun, willing to skip book group to clean (shudder), shooer away of children monster that I learned I can become under duress??
Adieu, ciao, cheerio, toodle-oo, buh-bye.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Go Back Where You Came From
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11 comments:
Glad you feel back. I have the same moods when we are selling a house. Why don't they like it, we love it, we brought children home from the hospital, had Christmas morning, first days of school...it is all very emotional.
I feel bad house hunting too, when I immediately don't like a house and we do an about face to the car. I mean, someone likes it enough to live there.
Oh well...your house is SOLD!
I so remember that process. We sold our house the 2nd day it was on the market, but still the stress of having to have it spotless at all times. We kept it on the market for only 2 weeks just to make sure, but that was enough for me.
Congrats! When do you look for house in SLC?
Yes, I was also very sad when we sold our home in Oklahoma. It is very emotional.
But now you can have fun looking at new homes in SLC. I love to look at homes.
Skipping book club to read?? I am very concerned Lu. I haven't ever had to sell a house or go through the process. We have always rented. I SO dread the process. Angie will be going through it in a few months, so I guess I will hear how it goes through her.
Hope you at least stop to watch Jack tonight!
Hey Lucy - glad you are feeling better. There is nothing like the stress of moving to completely ruin your life. I remember having to sell our town home and move up here to Spokane - I never want to do that again. I grew up with an airforce dad and moved quite a bit - but I don't know if you ever lose the stress of it all.
It was a fun day at the park today! My kids had a great time and came home with sunburned faces - my poor pale faced kids.
You're entitled to a pity party every now and then! I have them more often than that--I understand that feeling of being picked on while witnessing all the "charmed" lives around me.
You've had some rough times lately but I'm glad to hear your spirits are lifted.
Glad you are back!! There is nothing more stressful than selling a house. It's so much work to make it perfect and them keep it perfect. I'm so glad it sold so fast so that we can enjoy your last few months together.
so glad you are back. i think what you felt is normal. you are honest about your feelings and i love your blog for that reason.
yay on the house being sold.
enjoy the glow, and try to bottle some of it for a day when you might be searching!
I am like that when I sell stuff on ebay! I take it way too personally. I don't think I will survive myself when the time comes for us to sell our first house.
Lucy you crack me up. I always laugh at my mom that people but a house not the owners, but she buys the owners and expects people to do the same. But nobody wants to be told their opinions are subpar so it is stressful. And the move. Don't get me started. I've moved more times that I care to count. We all have those comfort-zone sweaters. I love the pic of you making a face. Keep up those good-mood exercising days. Than you can be just like me in everyway and not just the probability that we'd get a knock at the door when we're not dressed.
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