For at least the last six months, Jay and I have known that we would be spending four days dressed like pioneers and leading a group of teenagers and a handcart across the wildnerness in an activity known as a trek.
If you are a member of the LDS church, you probably know what a trek is. For those who are not, the idea is probably very bizarre. I know when I told the women who attend the same bookclub as me what I would be doing the third week of June, most were bewildered as to the "why?"
I think there are a lot of "why"s. For me, it was because I was asked and because my husband really, really wanted to do it. I've been a member of my faith me entire life and it's fair to say that I took for granted the stories and history of the early mormon pioneers. Knowing the names and details has never been very important to me. Instead, I let myself be content with the more general "it was hard and they were brave" summary.
My greatest worry about being a "ma" for this experience was the pressure I felt to be a strength and not a burden to the youth assigned to my family. Knowing it would be a challenge both physically and emotionally (I have had an aversion to teenagers since the moment I stopped being one), I was most concerned that many of the spiritual moments would not be fully utilized if I wasn't better prepared to understand the parallel experiences those in charge were attempting to re-create. I use Jay's gift of memory and his zeal for pioneer stories as a crutch, but did read The Price We Paid to prepare myself.
Upon arrival, I felt butterflies in my stomach. In my blue bonnet and skirt, I longed to hang back and put off the transformation of myself into "Ma." But, as I looked around, I noticed most of the teenagers looked even more uncomfortable to me so I flipped on my uncomfortable switch, and gathered my new kids together for introductions and fun get-to-know-you games.
Jay and I were a great team. I never had to concern myself with any part of the handcart. Early on, he drummed up enthusiasm with his contagious love of pioneer history. I channeled my former student council self and quickly depleted my ideas for name games and bonding moments. It seemed like we'd never get started....but then.....
Wagons- ho!
Each person was allowed one five-gallon bucket for clothes, scriptures, toiletries, eating utensils and one plastic trash bag filled with a coat, sleeping bag and blanket.
Able to stand back and take pictures while Jay gets the family working together on assembling the handcart.
Unlike historical handcarts, we had canvas covers to help keep all of our stuff in.
Our family zigzagging from left to right:
Nicole, Brian, me, Tierra, Brandon, Kerby, Darien, Derek, Sassie, Tyler, Becca, Jay and Alex.
I could tell right away that we had GREAT kids. Everyone was genuine and happy to help and no one was complaining. I could tell that one of the girls wasn't over enthused about being there and the likelihood of getting dirty, but she didn't whine about it so I watched and waited to see what the experience would be for her.
Getting started
Our wheel came loose right away. Thankfully, this fix did the trick and we had no more worries the rest of the time.
The first day was a purposely long day. We didn't get started until well past 1:00 in the afternoon and there was lots of stopping and waiting. As everyone was getting to know each other, most of the breaks were welcome and spent playing more games.
As the day turned into evening and the evening turned into night, the playfulness transformed into fatigue and some impatience from not knowing when we were going to stop. Most everyone had heard that the first day included a "big hill" and the sun was long gone before we got to that part in the trek.
It was hard. As I remember if physically, I can remember thinking, "I can do this. We get breaks just when I need them and I am going to be able to do this." During each pull and push, I'd get to the point where my heart was beating too fast for comfort. I never wanted to be the out-of-shape "ma" that had to hold back the much more fit teenagers with my heavy breathing, and I'm happy to report that I never had to be. A much needed break always came at the right time and as hard as it was, I made it.
After the first big hill, which was deeply rutted and windy, we approached a station where leaders borrowed the ropes that tied onto the front of the handcarts used for pulling from those that were waiting to ascend the final steep section up to camp. As we reached the front position, an additional two rope systems were added to our handcart to enable more people to pull the handcart up. There were probably a dozen extra bodies helping us get up that hill and as we reached the top, I started to involuntarily cry because I had never felt so sick and tired from over exertion. I was completely spent and felt my spirit murmur about how ridiculously hard those in charge had made the first day.
Grumpy, tired and totally nauseated, I felt a prompting to pray. The few members of my trek family that were around had already crawled into their sleeping bags to sleep. The others were either back down the hill to help others up or getting a bowl of soup to eat. Knowing there wouldn't be a better time, I knelt down on my sleeping bag and understood that this trek was going to be an eye-opener for me.
Becca rests while we wait to start on the hill.
I wish I could have taken pictures of the hill. some of the kids went back and saw the really steep section the next morning. I went down the hill for awhile, but realized with every step down, I was going to have to come back up and I was still very, very tired from the day before and a night of absolutely NO sleep. This is the last part of the path to camp, the cruel not-at-all steep but still uphill part that followed "the hill".
What camp looked like the morning after. Not very organized when you are setting up at 12:30 am.
Each morning, we gathered as a family for a devotional and scriptures. Even though we had all known each other for only a day, the feelings for each other were warm and loving.
A day of sweat and bonnet wearing was not kind to me. Becca, a master braider, helped me with my hair.
After only a short pull, each handcart company was stopped and asked to assemble to a gathering place.
There, the men were asked to leave their families and help their government. It was an extremely emotional moment. Many were in tears knowing the hard day ahead of us.
The boys took the buckets from the handcart to lighten the load and followed the officer.
We girls were left with the handcart, our bedding and water and the resolve to get it done, just the six of us.
Again, it was a very, very hard pull. The road we followed was uphill the entire way, with many switchbacks, and there were times it felt like I was the only person pulling that handcart. I know it isn't true, but it must be what each girl in my family and in the entire group felt. Those handcarts are 500 pounds. They are heavy and hard to pull. We took breaks and had some timely help along the way from some silent helpers. The lessons learned from this experience are personal and extremely buoying.
Later that day, we reached what became known as "Base Camp" and had an afternoon to play pioneer games and get ready for an evening hoe-down. I thought asking us to participate in anything physical was a bit presumptuous, but again, teenagers have an energy that's contagious.
I did participate in the hair washing station. It felt nice, but as I was one of the last women to use the water, I think I would have been better off to have just kept my braids.
We set up our own campsite and finally got to cook our own meal. It was a lot of fun working together and our kids did everything!
Jay and I doing the reel at the hoe-down.
The third day of the trek included no hiking. It was planned as a spiritual day and after a morning family devotional, all of the kids were given over an hour in what was referred to as solo time. We walked up to an area as a family and then we spread out and had time to read scriptures, pray, write in journals or just think. The views were amazing and I really enjoyed the quiet time to reflect. There was an afternoon fireside with Elder Webb from the seventy and that evening we played games, exchanged personal information to keep in touch and ended with a family testimony meeting. I was amazed by the things I heard. That night convinced me that every penny and every minute spent planning and carrying out large scale events like this are worth it. These youth are bombarded on every side with hard and heavy things. Seeing them lift each other up and share how much they need to know that they are not alone touched me.
The view from the area we had solo time. Back together again!
The boys relax in what became known as our condo:)
Jay tiding up after our last family dinner of turkey and potatoes
The last morning started early with a sunrise devotional. We had to wake the kids up at 5:30 to watch the sunrise. I hope they enjoyed this moment.
Last look at the condo before we pulled down camp.
Impromptu game of Ninja played by our boys.
Pioneer dress may not be the most flattering, but it sure was functional! I had no problem sporting a skirt, bloomers and bonnet for four days. I think Jay looks ruggedly handsome by day 4:)
The dust was noxious on the way down. This is how you brake a handcart.
At the pick-up spot right before saying good-bye. We really felt like a family at this point and I love these kids.
Alex and Nicole sum it up perfectly.
If you ever have a chance to be on a trek as a ma or pa....go. If you have youth that have an opportunity to go on a trek....send them.
I had an amazing experience that I will treasure forever.
A few days ago, I spied the boys inventing a new game outside. One boy would ride his scooter while another was pulled by the scooter on Henry's tricycle via a bungee cable hooked between the two. The tricycle was heavy and wide enough that tip overs for the one being pulled were rare.
Yesterday, I noticed the activity being repeated and went outside with my camera to capture their creative play. Only, as soon as I got outside, Henry started throwing a conniption, refusing anyone but him to perch atop his plastic red seat.
With a shrug of their shoulders, Seth and Sam altered the plan by having the scooter pull....another scooter.
You can predict the rest...
Sam is the daredevil in our family. He's usually up for trying anything.
Still feeling good...
Seth builds up speed for the big corner.
An object in motion likes to stay in motion. Sam's scooter started to whip around the corner and he smartly jumped off. But not without consequence...
The scooter struck his foot and scraped off a chunk of skin on his big toe.
Mean mom takes a picture before going inside to clean the wound. Notice the abandoned scooters in the background.
Last weekend, my dear friend, Hannah, passed through my world. We became friends during the year I lived in Utah, which was the year all things blogging exploded for me. I was touched, deeply, that she re-routed her family to pass through my town on their way to the Lonestar state.
Her family rendezvoused with mine at a local restaurant and it was the first time for both of us that we had met each others' husbands. Proper bonding is never really possible while chewing, so the men didn't become BFFs but afterward, when it was just me and Hannah again, she said, "Jay is a lot different from what I was expecting." She further explained that on my blog, his persona comes off as mostly serious, maybe even intense. Maybe it was pictures like these that helped that idea formulate:
I get it. He is serious and intense. But he's also sensitive, funny, kind, cute and adorable. It has been my privilege for the last fourteen years, to get to know and understand this man named Jay. Therefore, it is my joy and my song to share his unique personality to the rest of the world. Here are 36 things that you may not know about this fascinating man.
1. He is one of the few, or even possibly the only one, that can claim that soda is good for him. The carbonation helps him swallow his food in a way that water, milk and juice do not.
2. He'd like to live off the grid, but can't because he married someone too normal.
3. You will never catch Jay wearing pants without a belt. It is a major fashion faux-pas, in his opinion.
4. He is very good at crossword puzzles.
5. He thinks he, Dan Patrick and Tony Kornheiser would be great real-life friends.
6. He brushes his teeth for a really long time. Seriously. I've tried to outlast him at the sink before and concede to his superior brushing skills each time because there is simply nowhere else for the toothpaste in my mouth to go.
7. He can figure out anything. I am a pay-someone-who-already-knows-how-to-do-it kind of girl, but he can just wing it, or, better yet, figure out the instructions. I was all set to call someone to clean and get the hot tub going, but he just took off a few panels here and there, drained it, and knows which chemicals to add to get the water pH right. Saved me hundreds, I bet!
8. He loves salsa and meringue music. If he hears it, it's an almost guarantee that some Jay-style dancing will follow.
9. Anyone I meet who knows who also knows Jay always tells me that he is "the nicest guy." I like that he's nice to people.
10. He gets horrible heartburn. He has to take prilosec, prevacid and zantac everyday.
11. He still cuts his own hair.
12. He also still likes NASCAR. I kind of thought it might be a passing fancy, but, sadly, it is not. Tony Stewart continues to be his favorite driver and Jay has even started buying little diecast cars with all of Tony's various paint jobs.
13. He isn't convinced that his office is also his man-cave.
14. He listens to podcasts when he runs. I don't see how listening to Dave Ramsey talk about staying out of debt motivates him to run sub six-minute miles, but who am I to question the ways of those born to run?
15. He has random allergic outbreaks. Several times, but never consistently, he'll come back from a run with eyes that can barely open, itchy, itchy skin and trouble breathing. It's freaky!
16. It embarrasses him to have a big deal made out of his needing gluten-free food. He'd much rather silently go without.
17. Still, I know he's touched when someone makes the effort to prepare something he can eat too.
18. He loves getting the newspaper. Loves it.
19. He also likes to be the one to get the mail. Since most of the mail these days consists of junk radiology conference invites, I say, "go for it."
20. Commercials about feminine products make him blush. He thinks all such advertisements should be relegated to channels like Oxygen or Lifetime.
21. What am I talking about? He has no idea those channels exist.
22. He's a talented woodturner and can make beautiful pens.
23. He laughs without inhibition. If he thinks it is funny, he will laugh out loud.
24. He has no travel bug. I can't convince him that going to Europe with me is worth the time and expense. I think I need to find a race for him to run in to get him over there.
25. His ringtone on his phone is the monologue from the Old Spice Commercial. This is exactly why we get along.
26. He sings in the ward choir, even though he doesn't want to.
27. He calls a man in town his nemesis because this man once bad-mouthed Jay's high school cross-country coach after a race, not knowing Jay ran for him and his subsequent great admiration for this particular coach. Now, Jay takes great pleasure in beating "Jerry" every time.
28. He'll shock me now and then by being really short with people on the phone when he's on call. I've even heard him almost yell. The people on the receiving end are usually radiology techs that mess something up or don't do their job right, but sometimes it's even another doctor and I find it really out of character. That's what a stressful job mixed with what he considers incompetence can create, I suppose.
29. He has two kinds of "Arghs!" One is higher pitched and makes me smile, even though I feel bad that something has frustrated him. The other is lower, from the back of the throat with a rasp, and it makes me tense.
30. He is frugal when it comes to spending money on things like clothes, toys or fixing the dent in his car because these things are "not necessary" but has no problem paying $4 or $5 for soda at movies and games.
31. He has a loud natural speaking voice.
32. He hates tomatoes and feels a little betrayed that I don't anymore.
33. He loves to pick up the tab at restaurants.
34. His generosity is balanced by his inability to eat out at most restaurants and the rare desire to be social.
35. He likes to make me and the boys happy. As proof of my point, remember this series of self-portraits he let me take of the two of us at the opera?
A novice at holding the camera, I explained the need to resist the temptation to tilt the head back. Always remember....chin down.
After this pictures, I added the helpful hint that it also helps to jut your neck out...just a bit.
See? He makes me happy because he knows how to make me laugh.
36. He is wonderful at 36.
If that's not enough information for you, refer to past birthday posts. Apparently, I feel the need to numerate on birthdays:)
We enjoyed a lovely steak and salmon dinner followed by a highly amusing showing of The A-Team (which deserves better reviews than it is getting. It's totally cheesy, but it's supposed to be. I loved the balance between humor and overdone action. Best of all, Jay enjoyed it too.)
I didn't like this book until the very end. It seemed filled with many of the tricks and techniques that can drive me crazy in a novel: constantly shifting perspectives from different narrators and a lack of chronology in its plot development that seems artsy but, at times, just feels like lazy writing to me. I wonder if authors that do this actually write two, three, four or more different stories, shuffles the pages together like a deck of cards, and then depend upon the patience of their readers to wait until they choose to tie the stories together, declaring the end result to be a novel instead of a collaboration of short stories. It is also loaded with fragmented sentences. I'm a casual writer myself and champion the effect leaving a subject or verb or both from the beginning of a sentence can have. Keeps things from being redundant and words from being overused. Simply illustrating my point:) So many incomplete sentences, concentrated together paragraph after paragraph, however, made the flow of the page very noticeably choppy. For a time, I let these things irritate me. As I read about the unconventional monk, Corrigan from Ireland, who spends his seemingly futile ministry giving hookers a place to use the bathroom and taking old people out for joyrides in his beat up van, I wondered if McCann was only interested in the underbelly of society. I assumed from the title that his book was going to be about the world spinning, or, in other words, day to day life. Surely, there are lives whose everyday isn't filled with drugs, or pimps or acts of manslaughter or grief from the death of a beloved child. Surely, somewhere, someone is doing laundry, exercising, cooking a spaghetti dinner and speaking with less profanity. Eventually, McCann's spinning world came into focus and it was exactly the beautiful thing I believe day to day life actually is: a friend helping a friend, a stranger doing something heroic, beauty and light forcing its way through the cracks of the chaotic and mundane. With the real life event of a man walking across a wire between the two World Trade Center towers in 1974 as a stunning backdrop, McCann shows how the much more ordinary things, even ones labeled as hopeless, weighted as weary and burdened with ugly, supply the meaning to what we all must endure: life.
It's been awhile since I've downloaded pictures onto my computer. Tonight, I gathered my cell phone, my small Nikon CoolPix and my large Nikon d5000 to see what blog posts I am missing. Turns out, too many so I'm going to jumble them all together and call it a stew.
About a week before school finished, I surprised Seth by volunteering to go on one of his fourth grade field trips. I was very disappointed to discover on my way there that I had forgotten my good camera. Thankfully, I had my cell phone camera, despite its crummy image quality.
It was a very cold day for late May. We were happy to get out of the mountain air and into the deep of the mine where it was about 15 degrees warmer.
Seth and his peers about to board the cars to take us into the mine.
The opening to the mine shaft.
I found the entire tour to be fascinating. As I listened to the demonstrations about different mining techniques and working conditions, I wondered what motivated miners to do this day after day. The hope of a big pay-off? It doesn't seem like many workers became rich. Perhaps it was the love of back-breaking, life shortening, wet, cold, and dark work. This is a ladder that a miner would have used to follow a vein, which normally ran upwards diagonally.
How the miners relieved themselves. It's on the rails, so they had to lay a chain along the tracks to keep the car from moving with them on it. Of course, the tour guide said it was a good practical joke to send someone on their way in their compromised position.
Us in our fetching slick and hard hat.
Seth had an end of the year choir concert. Cell phone quality. sorry.
I also volunteered for the school bike rodeo.
Cute old picture of Henry in early May before I started packing up the old house.
Seth and Sam participated in piano achievement days. They both did very well and received commendations in technique and artistry.
Sam with his judge
Seth being adjudicated.
The last week of school involved lots of extra parent participation. Sam's class put on a slide show and program that I snuck into late and left early due to a sick Henry at home.
Last day of fourth grade for Seth. The put on a barbecue. Jay and I both came but Seth ignored us to play soccer with his friends. I'm glad he did.
Sigh. Leaving more friends.
Good-bye Riverview!
The day after school was out, we left to spend Memorial Day weekend in Denver. One of our favorite things to do is to watch a Rockies game in Coors Field. We had a popular section and I was hoping to get on camera, but it was not to be.
Our view. Pretty good except for my fear of getting hit with a foul ball.
On Monday, we continued our annual tradition of running the Bolder Boulder. This year, I convinced my parents to meet us in Boulder to watch Henry while the rest of us ran. My sister, Sarah, decided to come a long and it was fun to do the race with her. We finished in a little over an hour and a half. Jay got a PR with a time of 35:45.
Then my parents followed us home to help us settle into the new abode and watch the kiddos while we went to some trek training.
Jay and I are a Pa and Ma for a four-stake trek this summer. We had an overnight training, which involved learning how to cook for our families of 10-12 with the tools provided, assembling our handcarts and a mini-hike.
Jay totally knows how to do this so I could just sit back and take pictures:)
Going up the hill. It is going to be hard. We are at elevation (I think around 9,000 ft, and it is dusty and hot. Just going the mile that we did, I was covered in dirt and dust. I can't even imagine what I'm going to look like after four days of it.
Come back. Jay and I were one of the few couples who wore our pioneer garb. We always seem to be out of the information loop and thought wearing the clothing was requested. I was glad I did, however, because those bloomers and skirt are a lot more breezy than jeans and it was hot! The bonnet is very functional too.
Then it was time to say good-bye to my parents. They helped out so much during their week's stay.
